And Then There Were None
by Red of Rivendell
Summary: A funny poem. Kind of LOTR related. Like Ten Little Indians. Reviews are always welcome.
1. Ten Elegant Elves

Ten Elegant Elves  
Ten elegant elves went out looking fine  
One fell in the mud, and then there were nine.  
  
Nine elegant elves arrived at the council, late  
One got frightened of Elrond's wrath, and then there were eight.  
  
Eight elegant elves stayed up past eleven  
One was too exhausted, and then there were seven.  
  
Seven elegant elves picked who went on a journey by drawing sticks  
The one that was chosen left, and then there were six.  
  
Six elegant elves believed that trees were not alive  
One was caught by ents, and then there were five.  
  
Five elegant elves did not want to eat more  
One was forced by hobbits, and then there were four.  
  
Four elegant elves felt the longing for the sea  
One actually went, and then there were three.  
  
Three elegant elves watched as trees grew  
One stayed in the position too long, and then there were two.  
  
Two elegant elves danced in the sun  
One slipped and fell, and then there was one.  
  
One elegant elf shot orcs by the ton  
He couldn't hold up long, so then there were none.  
  
A/N This was just a funny type of poem that I found last year. I don't own any of the species or some of the ideas. 


	2. Ten Hungry Hobbits

Ten Hungry Hobbits  
  
Ten hungry hobbits tried Elvish wine  
One got sick to the stomach, and then there were nine.  
  
Nine hungry hobbits gained a lot of weight  
One became to fat, and then there were eight.  
  
Eight hungry hobbits thought they were in food heaven  
One found out otherwise, and then there were seven.  
  
Seven hungry hobbits made cake with cake mix  
One ate all of the batter, and then there were six.  
  
Six hungry hobbits decided to skydive  
One's rope was made of spaghetti, and then there were five.  
  
Five hungry hobbits tried wild boar  
One threw up, and then there were four.  
  
Four hungry hobbits sang a song off-key  
One's voice cracked, and then there were three.  
  
Three hungry hobbits went to Mordor's zoo  
One ran out screaming, and then there were two.  
  
Two hungry hobbits found a hot dog bun  
One choked on a piece, and then there was one.  
  
One hungry hobbit made a horrid pun  
He laughed way too hard, and then there were none.  
  
  
A/N Reviews are always welcome. I'm open to suggestions for another poem. 


	3. Ten Gross Goblins

Ten Gross Goblins  
  
Ten gross goblins went to excavate a mine  
The shaft collapsed on one, and then there were nine.  
  
Nine gross goblins tried out some new fish bait  
It attracted piranhas, and then there were eight.  
  
Eight gross goblins met an elf named Kevin  
He was really Legolas, and then there were seven.  
  
Seven gross goblins tried some new lipsticks  
One was allergic, and then there were six.  
  
Six gross goblins destroyed an archive  
The archive was Saruman's and then there were five.  
  
Five gross goblins wanted to learn some plant lore  
One was bored to death, and then there were four.  
  
Four gross goblins met a dwarf named Gimli  
One fell to his axe, and then there were three.  
  
Three gross goblins wanted to be blue  
The potion poisoned one, and then there were two.  
  
Two gross goblins stared into the sun  
One was blinded, and then there was one.  
  
One gross goblin dialed 9-1-1  
He was caught, and then there were none.  
  
A/N I don't own any of the characters mentioned except Kevin, but he's really Legolas, so that doesn't really count. 


	4. Ten Nasty Nazgul

Ten Nasty Nazgul  
  
  
  
Ten Nasty Nazgul went out to dine  
  
One couldn't afford the bill, and then there were nine  
  
Nine Nasty Nazgul saw a penny behind a sewer grate  
  
One's gauntlet got stuck and then there were eight  
  
Eight Nasty Nazgul praised 'Thank Heaven'  
  
One was mistaken for thanking Morgoth, and then there were seven  
  
Seven Nasty Nazgul played toss with bricks  
  
One was hit on the noggin and then there were six  
  
Six Nasty Nazgul decided to test drive,  
  
One crashed into Minas Tirith, and then there were five  
  
Five Nasty Nazgul were really, really poor  
  
One earned tons of money, and then there were four  
  
Four Nasty Nazgul tripped over someone's knee,  
  
That someone was Aragorn, and then there were three  
  
Three Nasty Nazgul said 'Bippity, boppity boo'  
  
One became Cinderella's fairy godmother and then there were two  
  
Two Nasty Nazgul found a loaded gun,  
  
One shot the other, and then there was one  
  
One Nasty Nazgul met his grandson,  
  
He had to change his grandson's diapers, and then there were none.  
  
  
  
Note: This is by Andboriel Swann, but since the story's on my (Andboriel Swann) sister's account, it' 


End file.
